COMMUNICATIONS STYLE

“Don't be over self-confident with your first impressions of people.”

                                                                                    ~ Chinese Proverb

The above-mentioned quote is something that I try to keep in mind each and every day.  I am the type of person who is a people watcher.  I also like to keep an open mind in regards to giving individuals a second chance if my perception of their first impression may not have been very positive.  This has become easier as the years have gone by and I have grown and matured.  I still seem to focus on an individual’s eyes when I first meet them.  I firmly believe that the eyes are the windows of our souls and show what other forms of non-verbal communication may not.

According to O'Hair & Wiemann (2009), it is not always easy to make accurate perceptions, especially where first impressions are concerned.  Each of us tend to perceive selectively at some point in our lives, so it is very important to be aware of these tendencies and make a conscious effort to overcome these tendencies (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2009). Three suggestions which can assist in this goal are:  verify your perceptions; be thoughtful when you seek explanations; and look beyond first impressions (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2009).

This being said, the application assignment for this week required each of us to complete three assessments (i.e. the Communication Anxiety Inventory, the Verbal Aggressiveness Scale, and the Listening Styles Profile).  We also needed to choose two other individuals to evaluate each of us using the same measures.  I chose to ask one of the parents from my child care and one of the adolescents whom I foster.  I thought it would be interesting to see the difference in their viewpoints since my relationship is quite different with each of them.  Once this was completed we were asked to compare these results with our own. 

For the Communication Anxiety Inventory, the score I was given on the Communication Anxiety Inventory was 35.  This put me into the mild level (i.e. 34-46).  This means that I reported that I feel a bit uneasy in some communication situations but at the same time there are times in other contexts in which I feel more confident.  Communication also is not something that I worry a great deal about.

The results from the others, who were nice enough to assist me with this assignment, actually put me in a low level (i.e. 21-33).  This level means that I am perceived as being a lot more comfortable in communicating in most situations and feel confident in anticipating such encounters than what I scored at.  In many ways this is good, since I must give the impression that I am at ease regardless of what the situation may be.  This is definitely a positive sign as I am always advocating.  If others perceive I am comfortable communicating regardless of the situation, it works in my favor as an advocate.

For the Communication Anxiety Inventory, the score I was given on the Verbal Aggressiveness Scale was 58.  This put me into the level of moderate (i.e. 53-68).  What this means is that I maintain a good balance between respect and consideration for others’ viewpoints, and the ability to argue fairly by attacking the facts of a position rather than the person holding that position. 

The results from the others, who were nice enough to assist me with this assignment, actually put me in the same level in which I scored when I took the assessment (i.e. 53-68).  This does not surprise me since I have worked very hard (and continue to work very hard) in maintaining a respectful, considerate communication style regardless of who it is I am communicating with.  It is nice, however, to see proof that this hard work has paid off and I have met my goal (at least with these two individuals).

References

Halgunseth, L., Peterson, A., Stark, D., & Moodie, S. (2009). Family engagement, diverse families, and early childhood education programs: An integrated review of the literature.  Retrieved from http://www.naeyc.org/files/naeyc/file/research/FamEngage.pdf

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. O. (2009).  Real communication: An introduction. Boston:      Bedford/St. Martin's.