COMMUNICATIONS STYLE

“Don't be over self-confident with your first impressions of people.”

                                                                                    ~ Chinese Proverb

The above-mentioned quote is something that I try to keep in mind each and every day.  I am the type of person who is a people watcher.  I also like to keep an open mind in regards to giving individuals a second chance if my perception of their first impression may not have been very positive.  This has become easier as the years have gone by and I have grown and matured.  I still seem to focus on an individual’s eyes when I first meet them.  I firmly believe that the eyes are the windows of our souls and show what other forms of non-verbal communication may not.

According to O'Hair & Wiemann (2009), it is not always easy to make accurate perceptions, especially where first impressions are concerned.  Each of us tend to perceive selectively at some point in our lives, so it is very important to be aware of these tendencies and make a conscious effort to overcome these tendencies (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2009). Three suggestions which can assist in this goal are:  verify your perceptions; be thoughtful when you seek explanations; and look beyond first impressions (O’Hair & Wiemann, 2009).

This being said, the application assignment for this week required each of us to complete three assessments (i.e. the Communication Anxiety Inventory, the Verbal Aggressiveness Scale, and the Listening Styles Profile).  We also needed to choose two other individuals to evaluate each of us using the same measures.  I chose to ask one of the parents from my child care and one of the adolescents whom I foster.  I thought it would be interesting to see the difference in their viewpoints since my relationship is quite different with each of them.  Once this was completed we were asked to compare these results with our own. 

For the Communication Anxiety Inventory, the score I was given on the Communication Anxiety Inventory was 35.  This put me into the mild level (i.e. 34-46).  This means that I reported that I feel a bit uneasy in some communication situations but at the same time there are times in other contexts in which I feel more confident.  Communication also is not something that I worry a great deal about.

The results from the others, who were nice enough to assist me with this assignment, actually put me in a low level (i.e. 21-33).  This level means that I am perceived as being a lot more comfortable in communicating in most situations and feel confident in anticipating such encounters than what I scored at.  In many ways this is good, since I must give the impression that I am at ease regardless of what the situation may be.  This is definitely a positive sign as I am always advocating.  If others perceive I am comfortable communicating regardless of the situation, it works in my favor as an advocate.

For the Communication Anxiety Inventory, the score I was given on the Verbal Aggressiveness Scale was 58.  This put me into the level of moderate (i.e. 53-68).  What this means is that I maintain a good balance between respect and consideration for others’ viewpoints, and the ability to argue fairly by attacking the facts of a position rather than the person holding that position. 

The results from the others, who were nice enough to assist me with this assignment, actually put me in the same level in which I scored when I took the assessment (i.e. 53-68).  This does not surprise me since I have worked very hard (and continue to work very hard) in maintaining a respectful, considerate communication style regardless of who it is I am communicating with.  It is nice, however, to see proof that this hard work has paid off and I have met my goal (at least with these two individuals).

References

Halgunseth, L., Peterson, A., Stark, D., & Moodie, S. (2009). Family engagement, diverse families, and early childhood education programs: An integrated review of the literature.  Retrieved from http://www.naeyc.org/files/naeyc/file/research/FamEngage.pdf

O'Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. O. (2009).  Real communication: An introduction. Boston:      Bedford/St. Martin's.

COMMUNICATION STRATEGIES

For this week’s blog assignment we needed to share at least three strategies we could each use to help us communicate more effectively with those we communicate with on a regular basis.  Like most of us, I wear many different hats during the day (i.e. mom, child care provider, foster mom, friend, area representative for exchange students, student, etc…).  How I effectively communicate differs from group to group.  Three strategies that I use on a regular basis, however, are:  1. Always show respect for the individual I am communicating with.  Each of us is unique in our own ways (i.e. culture, family, thoughts, etc…); It is important to always remember this if I expect others to show me respect.  2.  If we are unsure of how to communicate, ask questions.  Most individuals would rather be asked than have a person guess what they are thinking/feeling, etc…; and 3.  Always try not to allow ourselves the easy assumption of similarity.  According to Bennett (1998), each culture is different in their languages, behavior patterns, as well as their values.  It is important to remember this because if we attempt to use one’s self as a predictor of shared assumptions and responses, we will run into a communication problem.  This is because each culture embodies a variety of patterns of perception and behavior, it is important to embrace/understand the differences as well as the similarities (Bennett, 1998).

Reference

Bennett, M. J. (1998). Basic concepts of intercultural communication: Selected readings.  Yarmouth, ME.: Intercultural Press.

TELEVISION SHOW OBSERVATION ASSIGNMENT

This was a really fun assignment.  I rarely get the chance to sit down and watch television so it was not too hard to pick a show to watch.  I decided for this assignment I would watch the show “Wipeout”.  I chose to watch this type of programming for various reasons including needing to watch something that would be entertaining with no sound as well as with sound.

For those who have not seen this show, contestants of all ages, shapes and sizes go head-to-head in four different rounds of play.  Each of the rounds is filled with really hilarious obstacle courses.  Each contestant is trying to become the “Wipeout Champion” and take home the grand prize of $50,000. 

I am a people watcher by nature.  I love to observe everything around me so this was a great assignment.  While watching the show with no sound, the two commentators seem to have a good relationship as their nonverbal cues (i.e. smiles) seem to demonstrate this.  The contestants each are showing many different nonverbal cues (i.e. smiles, frowns, stamping feet, frustration).  The impression I was given from watching this show with no sound is that the commentators seem to love laughing at the participants’ expense.  I also observed just how much nonverbal cues/instances each contestant displayed during this hour-long show (minus lots of commercials).

Once the sound was turned on for the second viewing, I enjoyed the show even more since I could now here all the comments and jokes made by the commentators as well as what the contestants had to say during their interviews.  It was also really different to hear what was being said to match up with the nonverbal cues the commentators as well as the contestants were showing.  I think that if I watched a show I was more familiar with, the results would be much different.  I also believe that if I watched a different type of show (i.e. sitcom; drama; soap opera) the results would vary from show to show.  All in all this was a really fun assignment and I might just try this again in the future.

WEEK 1 - BLOG ASSIGNMENT - EFFECTIVE COMMUMICATORS

I would first like to say welcome to everyone as we begin this next part of reaching our goals.  I look forward to working/learning with everyone during the next eight weeks.  When I read this assignment I could not decide which person/situation to use as an example.  I am very fortunate to be in contact with many great communicators.  I finally decided to use the resource worker assigned to me through the Department of Children and Families (DCF).  Cheryl is my contact when I am not getting the resources I need for the children/adolescents who are in my home (foster care).  I am very fortunate to have Cheryl as my resource worker since she is a great individual to work with and a terrific communicator.  If I need anything at all she makes sure the request is taken seriously.  She always answers her phone or returns my messages as soon as she can.  She also takes the time to really listen to what I am saying as well as allowing me to use her as a sounding board when trying to find a solution (for instance) to an issue I may be having with one of the children/adolescents and/or one of the various social workers involved in these cases.

In regards to modeling some of my own behaviors after Cheryl, I certainly hope that I do take her cues and communicate with others as well as she does.  It is important to have skills in communication in general, but it is especially true when you work with children/adolescents in as many capacities as I do (i.e. licensed home child care provider; foster mom; volunteer; and area representative for exchange students).  By working with someone with great communication skills, it allows me to reinforce my own skills as well as reflect on what I may need to change in my own communication style.